Not too long ago, wife and I were watching a “news” broadcast on TV and we were presented advice from a “lifestyle expert.” She appeared to be between twenty five to thirty five years in age, very attractive, vivacious, and fawned over by the young male anchor. But no background information about her was offered, education, qualifications, whatever. Touted as an expert, she was advising watchers/listeners about what they could do to be happier in their lives. Now, how could a youngster like that possibly think she could improve my lifestyle? (Natural old fart reaction to any advice.)
But, it started me thinking. I am 70 years old, have had 13 years of college, graduate school, and training dealing with people who are frightened, anxious, or in pain. I have three children, five grandchildren, have lived in major cities, suburban areas, small towns, and the relatively isolated countryside. I have worked in a high pressure job, been responsible for employees, and clients for thirty years. I am retired and have volunteered in literacy training, health care counseling, and done daycare for young children as well as the elderly. I’ve experienced life, maybe not always stylishly, in the 50’s, through the present, on the East coast, in the Midwest, Southwest, and the ultimate (for “lifestyle, that is) Southern California. With that under my belt, I think I am as much a lifestyle expert as that youngster on TV.
I should put up a new shingle: Lifestyle Expert, Counselor, and Adjuster. ( The Adjuster part will be the most fun, I think.). Certainly my qualifications cannot be questioned, except, perhaps the bald, overweight, 70 year old male part.
Well, I may have overstated my case. After all, I might have been spotted in ’59 wearing a Books Brothers tweed jacket, regimental stripe tie, chinos with the little buckle in the back, and Bass Weejun penny loafers, our, in the ’60’s wearing a blazer over a Madras plaid shirt, with jeans and hiking boots, or in ’71 wearing wide wale, cuffed, bell bottom pants and a tight paisley patterned polyester shirt and sandals on the streets of Detroit. After that it was suits, white shirts, ties and wing tips to work, and polos and jeans for weekends. Now, in Southern California, Nike basketball shorts and T-shirts suffice.
I know, attire does not a lifestyle make. But, it is a pretty good indicator to others of what you are about in your life. Also, for those of us who want to adjust our style, the clothes part is one of the more painless and easy changes to make. A little harder would be to adjust how we spend our time. There are ties to our occupation, of course. In the old New England town where I practiced, a physician would never be seen in a local bar or club(excepting the country club or the tennis club.). The controlled, somewhat aloof, seemingly sedate lifestyle seemed to be dictated by the traditional image of the compassionate healer, always ready to provide needed assistance, never out of sorts or unavailable. This vision of the doctor was often contradicted by his/her activities at home, in my case , on the little homestead, chopping wood, cultivating the garden, canning tomatoes, or making maple syrup.
An acquaintance of mine, an older GP, was called for an urgent case to his office on a Saturday afternoon. His wife “hollered” outside for him and was answered from the roof of their two story farm house where she saw him replacing some cedar shake shingles, in a three piece suit! Always ready, Doc Baver, in his suit and tie, dropped his tools, came down the ladder, jumped into his car, and met his patient in minutes. His wing tip shoes may have been a little scuffed, but his clients never complained about that.
Often, especially for us surgeons, the sedate, quiet style contrasted greatly with the somewhat frantic, though controlled scene we met in the ER, where and accident victim was being treated, where the stomach pain was being assessed. Yet, being “available,”ready, so to speak, in location, mindset and skill, is what the patient counted on to help him/her through a difficult time. Part of the lifestyle? Yes, of course.
Other components of our lifestyle are: what we value, with whom we have relationships/associationships, and as hinted above, where we live. I was out in the community, a town of 40,000+, visiting the grocery, taking my kids to the movies, going to the YMCA swimming pool, etc. I met patients all the time, outside of the office/hospital. While stopped at a traffic light, a patient came to my car window, pulling down his waiste band to show me how well his hernia surgery was healing. Once in the grocery, my older daughter was amazed that a patient raised her blouse to show me her gallbladder surgery scar (“was it OK?”). A surgeon in NYC would not be likely to have that experience. Location, location, location.
So, I guess my point is, how is that pretty little, thirty-something, woman on TV going to be able to give better advice on lifestyle changes than I am? Therefore, the new shingle, Lifestyle Expert, Counsellor, and Adjuster, free of charge, of course (I don’t have a license for that.)